The Obsidian Collection Page 43

  “Did my internship there, now my residency.” He shrugged, taking a sip of his drink. “What about you, Cam? What are you plans for the future?” He chuckled. “I remember being you. Just starting out, thinking I could make all the difference in the world.”

  “And that changed?” I asked. I found it hard to imagine this guy as anything but the cynical, smart-mouthed guy he was.

  He laughed again, this time louder. “Yes. You don’t realize how little control you have over things until your in there. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love what I do, but I also know I’m limited by bureaucracy and bullshit paperwork.” He shook his head. “I’ve lost count of the number of patients I’ve been unable to treat effectively because it wasn’t in the hospital’s best interests.”

  I could understand that. As doctors, we did what we could. But just like any other profession, we were limited by laws and political bullshit. In a sense, I was used to living my life based on the reactions of others. Why should my work life be any different?

  “Anyway,” Eric stood up knocking back the last of his drink. “Brush it off, and come in the next day with a fresh perspective. If that’s the only bit of advice you take from me, then I’ve have done my job.” He winked at me and sauntered toward the exit.

  Glancing at my phone, I saw it was nearly nine. Shit. Where had that time gone? Opening my wallet, I retrieved a few notes and left them under my glass. My keys in hand, I walked outside. What had I had? Three drinks? I was probably fine, but I didn’t want to risk it. I pulled out my phone, ready to call a taxi when a car pulled up in front of me. I waited as the window rolled down and found myself staring into those sexy green eyes.

  “You need a lift?” he smirked. I hesitated. Then nodded. Was there really any need to think about this? Wait the ten minutes for a taxi, or spend the next fifteen in his car. Alone. With him.

  I climbed into the passenger’s seat and belted up.

  “Thanks,” I said. “Didn’t want to risk a DUI.”

  He chuckled. “Probably a wise decision, Fletcher.”

  We sat in silence for a few minutes as I tried to distract myself from how being so close to this guy was affecting me. Sweaty palms, dry throat, and pounding heart—I had it all.

  “I’ll need your address you know. Unless you want to bunk at my house. Just in case the ex is still there,” he smirked. I glanced at him in surprise. “That was a joke,” he added.

  My heart dropped. For half a second, I’d thought he was inviting me back to his house. Which was stupid. He was a womanizer and a player. I had no business feeling the way I was about him.

  “On second thought…are you going to be able to get into work tomorrow?” he asked skeptically.

  “I’ll take a cab.”

  He waved his hand. “Don’t be stupid. Look, I have a spare room. You’re welcome to stay, and then I can give you a lift in the morning. Totally up to you though.” He shrugged, as if he couldn’t care less either way.

  Why not? I mean, really, why not? I had a spare change of clothes in my bag anyway and a clean set of scrubs in my locker. It made sense. This was me trying to convince myself it had nothing to do with spending the night at his house. But fuck, I was dying to see where he lived. And the idea of spending a few more hours with him talking to me like an actual person was too good a chance to pass up.

  “Sure,” I said, keeping my tone casual. “Only if you’re sure its not trouble.”

  “None at all.”

  Why was I surprised that he lived in a huge double-story townhouse off Mackland Street, overlooking Sunter Park? This was where people with money lived. As I followed him through the massive living area at the front of the house and into the kitchen, I had to hold in my awe. This place was insane. All the latest gadgets, massive flat screen television, oversized sofas. And then the kitchen. Wow. I didn’t cook very often, but if I had a set up like this, hell, maybe I would.

  “Nice place,” I muttered. Is this what a fellowship salary would get me? Bring it on.

  “Thanks,” he grinned. “The one plus about our job is we work so many fucking hours, it becomes really easy to save instead of spend.” He walked over to the bar and pulled out two glasses. “Drink?” I nodded.

  “I could get used to this,” I muttered, walking over to the window to check out the view. “And I bet the ladies love it.” Why did I say that? I was overcompensating for the creepy vibe I was sure I had to have been giving off. Eric simply laughed.

  “I’m sure they would.”

  Would? What did he mean by that? He walked over to me, handing me my drink. I took a sip, the whiskey burning as it slid down my throat. This could be a five-hundred dollar bottle of whisky and it wouldn’t matter; it all tasted like shit to me.

  “How long have you lived here?” I asked, following him back into the living room. He sat down on the sofa; arm spread along the top as he flicked on the TV. I sat down too, careful to leave a respectable amount of space between us. I drank slowly. Mainly because I didn’t trust myself not to hit on him if I got really drunk. The real me liked to come out when I was completely intoxicated.

  “A few years,” he shrugged, glancing around. “Not that I’m home much.”

  I could relate. I was beginning to forget what my place even looked like. Slowly, I was beginning to loosen up. I could feel the effects of the whiskey starting to set in. No more after this one or I’ll be hanging off the balcony. I cringed at the thought.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket. I reached for it and saw a message from Lucinda.

  All clear. We probably need to get together sometime to discuss finances and stuff.

  Fuck. I hadn’t even thought about that. This made telling my parents even more urgent. Every time I spoke to Mom, she somehow worked into the conversation that maybe it was time to pop the question.

  “Bad news?” Eric raised his eyebrows at me. I shoved my phone back in my pocket and shook my head.

  “Nah. Just realizing there’s more to a break up when you’ve been with someone for ten years.”

  Eric laughed. “That’s why I avoid relationships. They’re too messy.”

  Maybe he was right. What was the point in being in a relationship if I couldn’t be myself anyway?

  “So what, you just go from woman to woman, no commitments. And that suits you?” I asked. That kind of lifestyle had to get messy. Especially when the only place you really had the time to meet anyone was through work.

  “Something like that.” He grinned at me. “And it’s not as bad as you’d think. I stick to a few simple rules. I don’t do relationships. I don’t offer any expectations, and I don’t date anyone at work.” He made a face. “Because trust me, that’s where shit gets messy.”

  “So where do you meet people?” God, could I be anymore nosey? “Forget it. I don’t think before I talk sometimes,” I mumbled, rubbing my forehead. He threw back his head and laughed.

  “Trust me, it’s fine. After ten years, you sound like you’re gonna need all the help you can get being single. I have…friends. I guess that’s what you’d call them. So long as things are clear from the beginning with what you both want, then it’s all good.”

  “Right, but isn’t that technically a relationship?” I asked, raising my eyebrows. He rolled his eyes at me.

  “Yeah, if you want to get technical, it is.” He stood up, yawning. “Spare bedroom is down the hall, first room on the right. Towels are in the bathroom. Help yourself to anything in the kitchen. I’ll be leaving at six thirty, so be ready.”

  I watched him stagger down the hall, trying to figure this guy out. What was it about him that I found so damn appealing? My cock twitched as I took in his ass. Well, apart from the obvious things…

  Standing up, I rinsed out my glass and set it on the sink, before switching off the light and making my way to my room. It was after midnight already, and I didn’t feel like I was going to be getting to sleep anytime soon.

  Stripping out of my clothes, I climbed into
bed. No strings relationships. That’s basically what he had been referring to. The thought of hooking up with a guy, in secret, just for sex or whatever, honestly aroused the fuck out of me. But I knew that was just my curiosity talking. I could never handle that kind of relationship. Not for long, anyway.

  Surprisingly, I slept pretty well, my alarm dragging me out of bed just after six. Rubbing my eyes, I made my way down the hall to the bathroom. After a quick shower, I dressed and walked into the kitchen.

  “Coffee in the pot. Help yourself to bread, cereal or whatever.”

  “Thanks,” I muttered, trying not to stare at his bare chest. Why the fuck did he have to walk around with no shirt on? His pants clung to his hips, showing me a hint of the trail leading downwards…and those muscles. Oh, shit. If I thought about him for much longer, I’d end up with a very obvious—and hard to disguise—boner.

  He gulped down his coffee, placing the mug in the sink before disappearing back up the hall. Thank fucking God.

  After our night ‘bonding’, Eric had gone back to being a complete ass to me. Not that I’d been totally surprised. He was my boss. I got the feeling that he’d worked hard to build his cocky-as-shit reputation around the hospital. What I didn’t get, was why all the nurses could barely get a sentence out with him around? I mean, I got it. I didn’t get why they weren’t pissed at not being able to get him. Unless the story he had fed me about not dating at work was bullshit. Definitely a possibility.

  I walked into room eight and saw a familiar face.

  “Hey, Noah. How’s everything?”

  He grinned at me, and threw a cheeky wink to the nurse taking his temp. “How can things not be good when I’m surrounded by beautiful women all day?”

  I chuckled as the nurse rolled her eyes at me.

  Did I mention Noah was only eleven?

  “Noah. Where are your manners,” his mom said sternly from the corner of the room. I hadn’t even realized she was there.

  “What? It’s a compliment,” he complained. He sighed and shook his head, as if he couldn’t believe his mom was cramping his style.

  “I’m sure they’d be flattered to know you think that,” I chuckled. “How’s the pain?”

  “Pretty bad. Especially at night. But, you know.” He shrugged, as if to say ‘oh, well’.

  I admired this kid’s strength.

  “How is he today?”

  I looked up and saw Eric standing over me. “He’s okay. Hitting on the nurses,” I grinned. Eric laughed.

  “That kid cracks me up. He is smoother than me, I swear. If the cancer doesn’t get him, he’s going to be one hell of a heart breaker.”

  Like you? I thought. “What’s the treatment?” I asked instead.

  “We will do another scan and see where the tumors are at. Hopefully, they haven’t spread. If they haven’t, then we can start another round of chemo.”

  “And if they have?” He didn’t need to answer. If they’d spread, it meant the cancer was likely elsewhere. If it were spreading, the treatment became manage, rather than attack.

  “Let’s just see, huh? Organize the scans. See if you can fit him in for today. There is a pretty young redhead down in radiology you might be able to persuade.” He winked at me and I flushed. Fuck, I hated how obvious my feelings felt sometimes. Like I might as well have been wearing a neon sign that shouted, ‘I want to bone you.’

  “No problem.” I nodded. “I’ll get on it right after lunch.”

  I strode into the cafeteria and spotted Erin sitting alone. Grabbing a sandwich and a coffee, I went over to join her.

  “Hey,” she said, brightening up when she saw me. She moved her tray over to make room.

  “How are you?” I asked, sliding into the seat opposite her.

  “Good. Tired. Fuck, this is hard, huh?” she smiled.

  “Yeah, but worth it, right?”

  “Yeah, totally.” I shot her a look, not convinced by her sudden burst of enthusiasm.

  “Erin?” I asked, raising my eyebrows.

  She covered her face and sighed.

  “I don’t know, Cam. It’s so different to how I thought it would be. Everyone is so rude, and unhelpful. I just don’t know if I’m cut out for this.”

  “Watching too much Grey’s Anatomy?” I teased. She reached over and shoved me. “I get it. I really do. It’s a shock going from theory to this, but it’s only been a couple of weeks. Things will get easier. Your fellow can’t be any worse than Eric,” I joked.

  She rolled her eyes. “I’d give my left arm to have him over fricking Balliner. At least he’s easy on the eyes. Not that you’d care about that.”

  I flushed, diverting my eyes down to my sandwich.

  “Cam!” she squealed, her mouth dropping open. “I thought. I mean—”

  “Do you want to not announce it to the whole hospital?” I hissed. She clapped a hand over her mouth, her blue eyes wide.

  “What? That I had a girlfriend? I did.” I shook my head. This was bad. No matter how nice Erin was, I’d seen it all happen before. Nothing stays secret for long.

  “I won’t tell anyone,” she said defensively.

  “I know. It’s not that I don’t trust you,” I sighed. “Not even my parents know, okay? Nobody knows. I’ve barely admitted it to myself.” I stood up; my appetite all but gone. “Sorry, I have to go.”

  I walked off before she could respond. This was just what I didn’t need right now. Fuck. How could I have been so stupid?

  I walked into the radiology department, forcing myself to focus on my job. The pretty redhead Eric had hinted to me about looked up and smiled.

  “Hey,” I said, smiling back. “Any chance you can squeeze a pet scan in today?” I asked.

  “We’re pretty booked up, but if it’s urgent…” She tapped on the computer. “Can you bring them up at three?”

  “Great,” I said, relieved. I didn’t want to go back to Eric with the news that she hadn’t fallen for my charms. “Thanks, Annie.” She looked surprised, and then raised her hand to her nametag, blushing.

  Just as I reached the door, something came over me. I turned and smiled at her again.

  “You wouldn’t be interested in a drink, would you, Annie?” I asked, my lips curling into a smile. Her warm brown eyes lit up. She nodded.

  “I’d like that,” she said shyly. “Tonight? Over the road?”

  “I finish at six,” I offered.

  “I’ll see you there.”

  I spent the next five minutes regretting what I’d just done. What the fuck had I been thinking? Stupid. What a great way to keep my secret a secret. Ask out the first girl who shows interest in you at work. Crap! I was sick of pretending to be someone I wasn’t, so why the hell had I just done that?

  Because I was so terrified of actually being myself.

  I pushed Noah down the hall toward the elevator just before three. Eric had been impressed that I’d managed to get him in, but seemed less than impressed with my date. Why had I told him? Probably a lame attempt to convince myself that I didn’t have a crush on my boss. Which of course failed miserably. I found myself wishing it was Eric I was meeting for a drink. Which would’ve sucked even more. If there were one thing worse than pretending to be straight, it was having feelings for a straight guy.

  “You’re quiet,” Noah commented as I wheeled him into the pet scan room.

  “Sorry, kiddo. Stuff on my mind that I really shouldn’t be thinking about right now.” Or ever.

  “Want to talk about it? Mom tells me talking always makes things look clearer.”

  Now I felt even worse. Complaining about my problems to the kid who had been suffering from cancer since he was two?

  “You’re mom’s right, but my problems aren’t serious. Just stupid girl problems,” I said dryly, lifting him onto the trolley.

  “Do you have a girlfriend?” he asked, his eyes lighting up.

  “I did, but we broke up.” His face fell. I nodded toward Annie, who had just walked
into the room. “But I’m taking her out for a drink tonight,” I added with a grin. A big smile spread across his face.

  “Wow,” he whispered. “I hope I get to have a girlfriend one day.” I ruffled his hair as Annie walked over to us, a big smile on her face, just for Noah. He smiled back, shy all of a sudden.

  “I’ll be just out here if you need me, okay?” I said. He nodded, barely looking at me before his attention was back on Annie.

  “Hey. You’re here already.”

  I looked up and saw Annie standing in front of my table. Glancing at my watch, I saw that it was only just after five- thirty. I was early and I hadn’t even realized it.

  “You are too,” I pointed out as she sat down. She laughed and nodded.

  “I finished late. Kind of no point going home, considering I’d have to leave right away to get back here.”

  “Yeah. Same boat. Only I finished early, obviously.”

  “Are you okay?” she asked. “You seem kind of down. Is this about Noah?”

  “I don’t know why. I barely know the kid, but it sucks that there is nothing we can do for him.” I shook my head, my finger circling the rim of my glass. “I mean, what’s the point if we can't help, you know?”

  “You’re never going to be able to help everyone. I think paeds is one of the hardest areas to specialize in for a reason. Nobody wants to see kids suffering.”

  “Yeah, well. The worst thing is, I’m sitting here a mess, and do you know what he’s doing right now? Playing his Nintendo.”

  Annie laughed. “You might think he’s stronger than you, but he’s still just a kid.”

  She was right. And if he could handle the news, then what right did I have to be sitting here feeling sorry for him? What right did I have pretending? His words had stuck with me. He was right. Life is short. You do what you can with what you have. Was I doing that now? Making the most of my life? No. I was sitting here on a date with a beautiful girl, when all I could think about was Eric.